The loss...that I feel sometimes!

Sounds like an emotional topic! Well, it is. And as emotional as it sounds, I'm at a total loss; the loss of my life's significance...the loss of patience...the loss of right words for the right moment...the loss of control that I usually used to have...the loss of everything. Apparently, it's not leading me anywhere but to darkness. Darkness, where I can't find myself...where I'm losing myself more and more everytime I try to step up...where I've nobody to turn to. And as pathetic as it sounds, it's true. But all I can do is sit quietly and wait for it to go.

But the thing that I don't realize until now is that I've been doing it all wrong. I'm waiting for the darkness to go away; when it's just the absence of light. I'm sad and at loss because I don't have something significant that brightens up my day; or maybe that's what I believe. Maybe I do have that significant thing in my life but I'm looking for more. But am I not supposed to look for more? Because what I do know is that we should always try to make something of our life, our relationships, or friendships, et al. Easier said then done! Had it been so, I woudn't have been feeling this grief-stricken.

As a matter of fact, I can't even negate the one true fact i.e. After winter, must come spring. At least I'm this optimistic. Meanwhile I've been doing a little bit of thinking lately. Because you know when you're sad, you think about life like you've never thought before. And that somehow made me reach to some conclusions in my life. These conclusions vary from the friendship to the relationship that I share with the people around me to the goals that I set for myself.

Starting with the friendship, I think I've already written about it here at some length before. But the stuff that I realized this time around is a bit different. Here I'm talking about drawing a conclusion; and I pretty much succeeded in that. So going by the definition that says A friend is someone who's always available for you through thick and thin, I would say I'm blessed to have two really good friends. They have been there for me always and I was never at the loss of words while discussing life with them. And trust me, I did thorough testing. ;)

Coming down to relationships that I share with people around me, it came out to be a little disappointing. I studied people around me and drew the conclusion that I'm mostly unwanted or undesired. I would have used the term 'social pariah' but I would leave it for my self-loathing self that is not keen to show up as of now. Next time, maybe! 

Goals that I've set for myself! Trust me, I've set a thousand of them; some changes every now and then and some stays waiting to be accomplished. But dang, no luck as of now. I'm not at a loss of how to go about it; the only thing that's missing here is the dedication. Maybe over the time!

While I'm not fully able to comprehend the reason behind all this thinking, I sure understand what it feels like to find significance in the wrong things. For that matter, this piece has been like a guide for me throughout this time of loss. And yes, LOVELARS, I do understand the feeling when you ask 'Have you ever had those moments where you find yourself getting upset with yourself for getting upset?' Yes, I've been having those moments lately and all I can feel is 'loss'.

 Hoping it would soon go away!


 Until then,
 G 

Video Games and all that shit!

As vague as it may sound but the recent realizations made me see it in a different light. I’m quite a typical when it comes to video games- for me they are nothing but a means to pass time… a waste of time in other words. And in view of passing the time, I found myself pretty much stuck with this super addictive game called ‘Temple Run’. Not to mention it, I am still trying to get rid of this addiction. But this was until recently that I realized it’s more of a learning thing than just a game. A game that can teach more than just serving your leisure!

The first and the foremost thing that it teaches is to concentrate. The funny thing is we don’t have to put effort to concentrate here. It’s just so. But we do understand that concentration is the one thing that you can’t do away with.

Second in the list is timing. Perfect timing is what you need and perfect timing is what you need to work upon. That defines and makes your game. Not just the ‘game’ game but the actual happenings around you.

Next comes the consistency! For me, it’s one of the most important stuff to deal with. And sadly I suck at it. Quite frankly, it seems to me an amalgamation of all the above traits plus speed and practice.

Last but not the least, it teaches us to define the proverb ‘Practice makes a man perfect.’ And I can’t agree more, given that the more you practice, the better you become at your game.

I’m sure there is more than this. But for now, I can come down to these few points only. Hope to add a few more to my list.

Until later,
G

Eternal Friendship

One thing that is certain and defines all relationship is ‘friendship’. Believe it or not- it does act as the center of universe and rules our lives. Be it any relationship, it never fails to play its role. And one thing that I am absolutely sure of is that without friendship you’re definitely missing out something on your relationship or may be it is just left for the namesake. While all these thinking and logic make the concept of ‘friendship’ totally worth having, there is one thing that I’m totally uncertain of and that is ‘Eternal Friendship’.

I personally know many a people who claim to be ‘Best Friends Forever’ but I’m really not convinced- to the extent that it’s just another category for me. That’s why I avoided using the title ‘Best Friends Forever’ for this post…because I’m talking about the eternal friend here- the one that is for life and sticks around with you through thick and thin. The one who thinks the world of you and whom you can call anytime you need. The one who takes care of your special moments and is always there for you without fail. Sounds utopic, indeed! Personally I've never found that one true friend who has always been by my side. Over the time I made some great friends whom I would put under the BFF category but ‘eternal friendship’…what’s that!? I’m still alien to this category.

Or is it just the philosophy or the utopic concept that we have framed which constantly leads us to work up to the next level? Though I sincerely doubt that, here I’m stealthily hoping to find that one true friend one fine day. Isn't that what we all hope for!?

And as further and further I think about the whole thing, I think maybe it’s the one person that becomes your happily-ever-after. Makes a lot of sense here! Because you can be sure as hell that you’re going to spend the rest of your life with that person whom the world calls your soul-mate. But what if you end up with a total wrong person!? And believe me the odds of this happening is fairly high. This again pushes me to avoid having another think coming and to really think things through.

So where do we find this ‘eternal friend’ is an eternal question in itself. And the answer seems to be quite elusive. While the quest goes on and on, one thing that is certain is the need to work up your existing friendship. Who knows you might find your ‘eternal friend’ in your existing lot.

Love,

G

Birthday week and the strings attached with it

For the happy and enthusiastic self, Bryan Adam is no doubt the inspiration. Yes, I’m talking about the famous 18 till I die anthem.

‘I wanna be young the rest of my life…I'm gonna be 18 till I die - 18 till I die’

Much to the contrary, I always wanted to grow old and that too too fast. I always wanted to live on my own, wanted to skip those adolescent years to enjoy my 20’s with fun and fervour. But much to my disappointment, it’s nothing like that. All I want now is to skip the coming years and jump onto the future. Or maybe the nicer idea will be to peek into the future so that I get a fairer idea what’s in store. Or maybe I should drop this idea too as the more uncertain the life is, the better it is for you. Well, such is life.

But it’s not just about the uncertainty that I carry along with me with every passing year, it’s the cluelessness that surrounds me during my b’day week. The cluelessness when every other person asks ‘Oh, it’s your b’day coming. Excited?’ Excited! Really…for the added number to my age or for the extra baggage that it brings along. For once I wish I could find myself at a place I want myself to see during this week that year in future. Until then I hope this video could help me chill!

P.S. Surprisingly while I'm waiting for all the unexpected calls to come, there is this one wish that has totally caught me off guard. And it's from Google. Well, it is kind of a surprise call. Atleast for me. :)

- G

Guess who gotta go to the Zee Café Gossip Girl Night Out!

That’s me. Hell yes! Me and my friend got it, and we had a Gossip Girl night out at Hard Rock Café. And as much as I hate to flaunt it, I love to tell you all that I won Gossip Girl goodies too. Yayay! Ooops…that was a little Blair-ish. Wasn’t it? Anyhow, I gotta go to the party and that was quite a delight.

But I'll start with how we managed to get an invite. Well, I watch this show ‘Gossip Girl’ every night at 10pm on Zee Café. Wait, I don’t need to say it’s my favourite. Or do I!? :D Coming to the invitation story, I saw the advertisement where they were like ‘Tweet, tag your bestie and use #ZeeCafeGirlsNightOut, and win an invite’. I called my friend the very moment and we started tweeting as it was our chance to have a Gossip Girl fun. And, guess what…we won it. But that’s not the end to the story. Well, there was a slight confusion as we tweeted to Zee Café and HRC both. And we thought we lost it. But we didn't. Who wouldn't want to invite the ardent Gossip Girl fans like us!? :/ Te-hee.

Now coming to the main event, I was damn excited but all the excitement turned into disappointment when I realized we were quite late to the party. The party started at 6:30pm and we reached at around 7:45pm. And as soon as we reached, we asked the guy outside if it’s over but to our delight, he answered it’s just started. Whoa! And there started our #ZeeCafeGirlsNightOut. ;)

It was in true sense a Gossip Girl party. Loads of girls modelled themselves on S & B. Some just chose awe-inspiring pins. Some went for the regal look. Some went as fashionable as possible. Some gathered attention and some seemed like minions. The games that were organized were indeed awesome. There was this game where we had to paste a kiss sticker on Chuck’s cheek (poster :()…let’s just say we had to kiss Chuck. J Surprisingly, nobody spotted Dan and Nate. Guess Mother Chucker took away all the attention. And he deserved that. I remember when the show was in its first season Chuck seemed to me like an extra. And now here we are with Chuck …Chuck all around. Lol The other game was Chinese whisper, the Gossip Girl style. We had to whisper Gossip Girl quotes to our team and whosoever did maximum quotes would win. Well, our emcee was indeed a sweetheart to announce both the teams as winners.

But what made it an exclusive Gossip Girl party was the ‘Gossip Girl’ siren. Oh yeah! We were supposed to tweet all the time and whoever tweeted the maximum was the clear winner. And, believe me, that was the most ‘fun’ part. Every now and then we were checking out our phones, tweeting another tweet and doing it all in ‘Gossip Girl’ style. Yes, we were.  Remember when Gossip Girl siren goes off amidst a party. That was that. And I had my moment of Queen B as I won it. Yuhoooo! Besides me, there were two other winners (one of them was my friend). But I was the one who tweeted maximum. Why!? ‘Coz I’m the real Gossip Girl. D'uh!

It was indeed one hell of a party and I loved it to the fullest.

XOXO

G

My Favourite seven

I’m a girl and I love to accessorize myself. Ok. The second part I don’t do that often but I do love it. My love for accessories just gain momentum whenever I see Phoebe Buffay (Lisa Kudrow from F.R.I.N.D.S.) flaunting those big statement jewelleries and the flamboyant Serena (Blake Lively from Gossip Girl) donning anything and everything. And time and again it has impulsed me into buying those chunky pieces and other stuff.

So, here’s to my love for accessories. 

          

Some of my stuff that I bought some time back and some that I bought lately. A sneak peek! ;)

• These vintages sunglasses, I bought from Promod. It was an accidental buy. But after certain I started loving them way too much. I flaunted it quite a lot back then.

• I bought this neck-piece from Janpath (New Delhi) two years. As soon as I saw it hanging in the wall, there was a sudden urge to buy it. Sadly I never got a chance to wear it. I’m still in search of the perfect outfit with which it can go with.

• My first buy from Forever 21! Sigh! I've always loved it.

•  This is to my love for Eiffel Tower! I got it from Accesorize and wore it literally everyday for quite a while.

• My love for scarves grows more each day. I can wear them every day. This one I like particularly. It’s a silk scarf. I’ll call it a lucky buy as I managed to get it at just Rs. 150. You go there and they will quote it for Rs. 300 or so. Lucky, right. 

•  And these are my pretty pearl earrings from Hyderabadi Pearls. Now you see them in every other shop. These were a gift from a friend.

•  My love! I bought it just a week ago and I’m in absolute love with them. I wish I soon get a chance to don them.

So, these are my favourite seven. Feel free to comment if you like anything. And I would love to hear some of the shopping destinations where I can get some amazing accessories.

Love,

G

Bridget Jones and me

There is always that one novel which portrays your life in a way that makes you wonder if it’s you. And if you ask me about it, I would waste no time in thinking and say ‘Bridget Jones’ Diaries’.

Yes! And this is not only applied to me but to all those single girls who are struggling with their life every passing day. I bet all you girls…you read this novel once and you can easily tell a few moments where you can relate yourself to the character, Bridget Jones.

Here are some of my moments which makes wonder if Bridget Jones is based on me.

Zero love life: Bridget seems to be unlucky in love and has a real sad love life…or you might call it a zero love story. Here the case is same. And the common question that plagues both of us is ‘How’s your love life?’ Damn!

Craving for that sleek figure: There was a time when all I wanted was to be sleek. And I did everything I could to get that size zero thing. And I got that. But good grief, I got everything but complements. Hysterically, the same happened with Jones.

Impulsive Mother: Apparently reasons are different here but my Mom is no less impulsive than Bridget’s Mum.

Regular insecurities: This is the one that holds the stark similarity. Single woman living alone in a big city! What can you expect!

Last but not the least, Bridget is an Aries. ;)

And if I start reading the novel again, I’m sure I can come up with many more.

Day that starts with a bowl of corn flakes and a little comprehension…

Well, the title itself has said a lot, I guess. So, this is my regular routine these days. Struggling with the comprehension over a bowl of corn flakes! Yes, it’s pretty much of struggling only.

But this piece is not really about how I spend my day and all. This is rather for the disappointment I get every morning while trying to solve those English passages. (Little dramatic!) You know how it feels when you fare bad on the subject which you consider your forte. Well, the same I feel these days. But as they say practice leads to success. Keeping the idea firm, I’m doing my bit hoping for the best.

I know it had been a little vague but it did serve my purpose. Hope you hear good from me anytime soon!

Until later,
G

Getting started...

Heya...
Through this blog, I am getting myself started as a new entrant in the blogging world. Blogging has always been my interest. Though I never gave it a real thought. But as now I find myself quite alone, so I can give word to my thoughts. And yes I just got to know that you don't need to be a writer or something to have your blog post! :D So Ta-daaaa! Here I go! :P

 
Love,
G